I Don't Mind Waiting

Another night has again passed by-- and night is the hardest part of the day for me. It’s when the busy pace of the city life slows down, number of buses and cabs in the streets lessen, and darkness fell over the city with only electricity illuminates the establishments around. And silence rings through my ears—the silence that slowly kills me. It’s when night time that I realize I’m alone. It’s when I remember you the most. It’s when I cry the most.

I just can’t get to sleep now. I’m not excited bout tomorrow or the next day because it’s gonna be another painful and sad day. It’s another day of waiting, another day of crying over those memories we had, and memories we could have spent together—if only you were here.

How many miles am I away from you? Hundreds? Thousands? Oh well, it doesn’t tell how far. I guess it’s just too far.

I wish you know how painful it is for me just imagining you out of reach. I long to touch you, I long to hold your hands, I long to feel your face through my fingers. But I just can’t. I wish to hug you and give you warm kiss on your lips whenever you’re somber.

But I think those are impossible. Well, not if you’re here. I think of those times, imagining I will wake up one morning and you’re beside me. It hurts me so much that those aren’t happening—that those are blurred. It kills me that I just can’t do anything to comfort you in times you’re not feeling any good and you’re down. I feel so helpless that I just can’t do anything to be with you.

All I can do is cry. Maybe I have to let it out, because if I don’t, I’ll be terribly ill. Pain and sadness are the meanest things that could possibly kill you—emotionally. And now I can feel I am being devoured by those beasty feelings.

The pain in waiting is really excruciating. It’s more painful than slitting my wrist (But I’m not gonna do it of course, I’ll be double dead if I wont be able to see you). Perhaps that’s the reason why I just can’t sleep at night. It’s just painful and hard to handle.

I’m tired now. I wish I could sleep now. I wish I could bear that pain, and wake up one morning seeing your calm face smiling next to mine. I wish I’ll be hearing those words I long to hear from you—SOON.

I wish that day would come, and we’ll never be apart. May I have peaceful nights and blissful mornings with you.

I don’t mind waiting though. I just miss you.